Waiting... again

We are one week and one day away from the next Dr. visit. As well as two and a half weeks post learning of our diagnosis. I have give a huge thanks to the Down Syndrome Association of Northwest Indiana. They are more than amazing. The day after we received the diagnosis, I reached out to them to learn more. Within an hour, I got a call from a mother and the president of the organization. A week later, they sent us a HUGE packet with books and pamphlets on every question we might have. Even inclusive of a checklist for the babies first 5 years!! Maybe they should give these to all expectant Moms, just sayin.

While we are still very hopeful, we will learn a lot more about our baby girl upon this visit. They will be determining if she has cystic hygroma's on her neck. For those not familiar with these, they are growths that appear on the back of the neck and never go away. It could really mean whether our baby will make it or not. You see, 9 out of 10 pregnancies with a Ds diagnosis don't make it to term. So that is one fear. Couple that with Cystic Hygroma's and you have to very nervous and scared first time parents. Most babies that have CH do not make it to term, are stillborn or die before age 1.

Looking back on all 3.5 months of my pregnancy, it's kind of ironic. I never had one day of morning sickness. I had a couple spats of nausea, and didn't have much energy overall for the first 3 months, some shortness of breath, but that was it. I haven't had any caffeine, haven't smoked or drank in over 2 years and exercise regularly. My biggest worry was that our baby would have a peanut allergy or be allergic to our dogs. I thought this pregnancy thing was a breeze... then our bomb struck. Now all I worry about is hoping to meet her someday and praying the movement I feel isn't gas, but our precious angel telling me she's ok.

I do try to believe we are chosen and I do know that God doesn't give you more than you can handle. If I didn't, I have been reminded on NUMEROUS occasions over the last 2 weeks. Then there are the constant reminders that Doctors can be wrong; or the doubt and disbelief of inaccurate tests. Honestly, I know people mean well and are just trying to comfort us, but I can't think that way. I have to accept the diagnosis and prepare myself, my husband and my family for the life we are about to embark. Otherwise the shock of reality will not be the welcoming our little lady deserves.

I know most people don't know what to say and really there isn't much to say. Just knowing we have shoulders to lean on is all we really need. It helps to talk about what's going on in our lives because its our life now. It helps to teach people what we know about Ds and all that we are learning. It helps me to write this blog as well. So that I can share our story and maybe help someone that just learned this news to know they aren't alone.

The support we have in our lives is so beyond words. I truly feel so blessed to have such wonderful people to share this experience with us. Thanks again to all of you and please keep praying because the power of prayer does work especially while we are waiting.... again.

Bless you all,


  1. I think your attitude toward this all is amazing. Dealing with all of this prenatally is sooo not easy, but you seem to be holding up really well. Your little girl is so lucky to have such an amazing mama. I look forward to following your journey with you. Also, the ironic thing is- it looks like we're due pretty much the same time in September. Addison is going to be rockin' a little sibling.(-: I'm so excited for you, and I'm more than thrilled that you found my blog so that I can now follow yours. Yes, the road ahead of you is scary, but it is wonderful- I don't say that lightly. My daughter with Ds is truly the best thing that ever happened to me.

  2. I think you're so strong and brave Shona for writing this out and being open. It makes me unbelievably happy to know you have people on your side from the DS Association. Have you thought about a doula? Maybe some doulas have experience with DS in particular and could help? I know my doula helped me more than words can describe and she is still a fixture in my life ...


  3. just found deanna's blog today ... and from your comment to her, found your blog. thankful for the reports you have received in april, for the ds support you have and for your faith in God. you are being blessed with a precious package. =) love, ((hugs)) and prayers


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